Most of you probably know that before I got together with hubby, I was engaged to another guy. Shock Horror!!
I’ve not seen or spoken to him since. I have no wish to. I have no interest in what he does. He’s a part of my life that is in the past and that I don’t miss. Most people would understand that.
So imagine how I felt when a few weeks ago, a “friend” of mine saw some people that we both knew. I was fiends with both of them before I got together with my ex, but now they don’t speak to me – nothing like listening to both points of view. After she saw them, she was telling me all about my ex. About the fact he now has a son and that he’s lost his sight (he was blind in one eye anyway). That made me feel weird because I wasn’t sure how I should have felt. Yes it’s a shame, but I don’t feel sorry for him. I don’t want to contact him and send him my sympathies. If it wasn’t for her sticking her oar in, I wouldn’t have even known.
I told her at that point that I didn’t really care what he was doing with his life. Then yesterday, I got this email from her:
“Went to a party at Jane’s* mums on Sunday evening which was nice, got to meet quite a few people I’d not met before and got to see a few I hadn’t seen in a long time. Saw Joe* there too, met his wife and baby….he is gaining some sight back too apparently which is good news for him. His son is gorgeous, so cute and his wife is really pretty, just not what I was expecting at all”
Am I the only one who thinks that is totally out of order, inappropriate and insensitive? My response to her was this:
“Yeah funny, she looks exactly like her sister (she and her sister are identical twins and the other twin is married to his brother – weird). To be honest, I’m not really interested in anything to do with him. He’s a part of my life that’s in the past and that I don’t miss. I don’t want to know what he’s doing and I don’t want him and his family to know what I’m doing coz it’s none of their business. So as long as he and they weren’t asking, all is well with the world.”
“She doesn’t now; her sister has filled out a bit so they do look a little different. No, they didn’t mention you, I don’t suppose they would make the connection anyway, Joe* possibly would but he didn’t seem to register it. “
So even after I’ve told her I don’t care, she tells me that the twins don’t look like each other anyway. I just told her again that I didn’t care and she dropped it.
What she seems to forget is that if she is talking about people behind their backs, they are most likely talking about her behind hers. If I ever find out she has been talking about me, and stuff about what I’m doing, where I’m doing it, and who I’m doing it with gets out to my ex, well that’s it, I’ll never have anything to do with her again.
She wants to be careful, otherwise the truth about what really happened to the baby she “miscarried” might find its way out.
*Names have been changed to protect the identities of those that don’t really deserve it